There are hours I wish I could forget — seconds that have cut me for years.

I have hurt, and I have been hurt. I have trespassed, and others have trespassed against me. I have crouched in the shadows of Eden, hiding my soul away, naked and ashamed.

But Someone Else has been hiding me, too:

For you died, and your life is now hidden with Christ in God. Colossians 3:3

My life is now hidden — I am sheltered and safe. The truest part of me can’t be harmed — won’t be budged (John 10:29). The dents and dings and cracks will be polished away along with my tears (Revelation 21:4).

My life is now hidden — I am secret and mystery. Behind the veil, I am being transformed in ways I cannot see or imagine. The knowledge of the secrets of the kingdom of heaven have been given to me (Matthew 13:11, 2 Corinthians 3:18). When I catch up to the real Kelly, I won’t recognize myself.

My life is now hidden — I am free and unbound. I can be exposed and authentic without fear, because the part of of me you can still see here is so small and insignificant — a tiny, visible, frayed thread of a invisible, golden cord of soul (2 Corinthians 4:17, 2 Corinthians 5:3).

For I died. The memories and aches, the imperfections and strivings, the ways I can never, ever love myself — they went down to the depths of grave with my Savior. It is foolish to spend my energy protecting and polishing and propping up what is already dead.

In Christ, I’m no longer this life I sometimes want to hide in. I’m the life He’s hidden.

I’m no longer defined by my past or my present. I’m defined by His future.

We are all naked and ashamed, and have been since the beginning.

He covered us then. He covers us now.